Fellow Moms, Are We Losing Ourselves Trying to Have It All? A Look at The Intern and Work-Life Balance.

The Intern (2015), directed by Nancy Meyers, is a heartwarming comedy-drama that blends humor and emotional depth while exploring powerful themes like purpose, aging, mentorship, gender roles, and—perhaps most poignantly—work-life balance.

In this article, I’d like to focus on one of the film’s most compelling characters, Jules Ostin (played by Anne Hathaway), and what her story reveals about the struggle to balance ambition with the deeply human need for connection and peace at home.

Jules Ostin: The Woman Who’s Doing It All—And Falling Apart

Jules is a brilliant, driven founder and CEO of a fast-growing online fashion startup. From the outside, her life looks impressive—even enviable. She’s a leader in her industry, has a supportive husband, and is raising a young daughter. But as her company grows exponentially, her personal life begins to unravel just as quickly.

Behind the scenes, Jules is exhausted, overwhelmed, and silently unraveling. She feels like the worst wife and mother of all time, unable to be fully present in either role. Admired for her accomplishments, envied for her position, and quietly judged by others—including the stay-at-home moms at her daughter’s school—Jules becomes the woman everyone’s watching, but few truly understand. The emotional and physical toll of her “success” weighs heavily, revealing the quiet cost of trying to do it all.

The Betrayal That Cuts Deeper

As if juggling her dual roles as CEO and mother weren’t enough, Jules is hit with a devastating blow: she discovers her husband, Matt, is having an affair. The betrayal rocks her—not just because of the broken trust, but because it seems to confirm her greatest fear: that her ambition and long hours at work have cost her the family she holds so dear.

She blames herself, wondering if she worked too much, cared too little, or somehow allowed this to happen. Her world begins to crumble. The affair doesn't just mark a fracture in her marriage—it opens up every insecurity she’s tried to suppress. It’s the emotional breaking point that brings all the invisible sacrifices to the surface.

Matt’s Side: A Man Lost in the Shadows

While it's easy to view Matt’s infidelity as a simple betrayal, the film subtly offers a more complex, human portrait of his struggle. Once the primary caregiver and supportive spouse, Matt begins to feel lost and invisible as Jules’s career takes center stage. The shift in roles leaves him questioning his identity, his value, and his place in the family dynamic.

Instead of confronting his feelings or seeking open dialogue, Matt looks for validation outside the marriage. It’s a deeply flawed choice—but one born out of confusion, insecurity, and emotional neglect (both given and received). When confronted, Matt owns his mistake with visible regret. He misses the closeness they once shared and admits he didn’t know how to express what he was going through.

His mistake is not excusable—but it’s understandable, and it speaks to the silent breakdown that can happen when couples stop communicating their needs and fears.

Choosing to Stay—and to Fight for Balance

Despite the heartbreak, Jules doesn’t storm out. She pauses. Reflects. Considers. She doesn’t stay in the marriage because she has to—but because she sees the possibility of rebuilding. The affair becomes a mirror, forcing both of them to confront not just what went wrong, but why.

Matt’s honesty and Jules’s vulnerability open the door to a new kind of relationship—one where there’s space for real conversation, mutual respect, and emotional support. It won’t be easy, and it won’t be perfect, but they both make the decision to stay and do the work.

In choosing to stay—not just in her marriage, but in her role as a leader, a mother, and a woman trying her best—Jules reclaims the narrative. Her journey isn’t about choosing between work and family. It’s about finding a way to do both, without sacrificing herself in the process.

The Takeaway: Balance Isn’t Perfect—It’s Personal

Jules’s story is a reminder that work-life balance isn’t a destination—it’s an ongoing negotiation. It requires self-awareness, honest conversations, and a willingness to let go of perfection.

The Intern may be a feel-good movie, but its emotional core is grounded in a reality so many women face every day: the pressure to be everything to everyone—and the loneliness that often comes with it.

So, can you really have it all?

Maybe not all at once. But with grace, support, and truth-telling, you can build a life that honors what matters most—to you.